I'm Young And I'm Easily Bored.

I hate Sundays. Good ones are few and far between.
For some reason I really wanted to talk to my mum today.
But I didn't call because I realized talking to her could not be as satisfying as I hoped it would be.
And by the time I had realized I haven't spoken to anybody for two days,
it was too late to call there.

But I've been miserable for days. This doesn't change a thing.
I still hate everything.
I still hate everyone.
My dvd player doesn't plug into this television.
It was hot out today, but there were clouds so I didn't go outside.
I have to wake up in five hours to go to a school that I'm not even certain I want to keep going to.

I'm not scared of much. All those things normal people are scared of
like the dark, snakes, spiders, needles, flying, heights, public speaking, 
dying and dying alone are all parts of life I have somehow come to terms with.
But there are these certain phobias that stick.
 I call them phobias because they are fears that are irrational and debilitating.
I won't say what they are because it just so happens I'm terrified of people knowing my secrets.
There's one. You get the picture.

I'm becoming apathetic. I care about nothing.
 It's horrible and this is no way to live. It's not even a way to die,
that's how miserable it is. Something has to stop. I need a change.
I don't really know what's happening and that's the worst part of it all.

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